Mutant Chronicles

Mutant Chronicles (2008) movie poster

(2008) dir. Simon Hunter
viewed: 12/30/09

Bad science fiction.  Gotta love it.

Actually, Mutant Chronicles doesn’t really entertain quite to the level of badness that it could.  It’s still bad.  Very bad.  Yet somehow they got John Malkovich to show up in it.  Outside of that the cast is made up of Ron Perlman, Devon Aoki, Thomas Jane and a squadron of stock characters mostly chosen for nationality variance.

Apparently, this evolved from a role playing game from long ago.

The sad thing about modern bad movies is because of CGI, they can reach a lot further than they could in the old days when you had to build real sets.  This film has an aesthetic palette akin to Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (2004), which I apparently watched while not updating this site.  Its muted color palette and WWI meets the future design aesthetic allows for all kinds of nonsensical idiosynchrases.  And blood splatter that is a bright digital red against the dark tones of the rest of the images.

How I managed to select this out to rent or to manage to have remembered…I’m not totally sure.  I have a penchant for bad science fiction.

The whole backstory to this film is that 10,000 years ago or something a “machine” came to earth and started turning people into “mutants” with one sword-like arm, ugly bald heads, and a fervor to kill humans or turn them into “mutants”.  Somehow, some ancient order sealed them deep in the Earth.  Okay, now flash forward to some time in the future when the world has been divied up into four “corporations” that span the continents and probably boil down the racial typing.  In fact, the names of these groups are things like “Mishima” for the East, “Bauhaus” for Eastern Europe… it’s very silly.

Actually it’s the worst film of its kind since Neil Marshall’s Doomsday (2008) or probably any Uwe Boll film ever made.  How does this crap get made?  Oh yeah, there are people like me who like to watch bad science fiction.  Maybe I better shut up.

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